Life on the Tall Side

Dear darling daughter,

I was once that girl! The one who was taller than everyone in her class! The one who stood at the end of the line in height order and the back-row center of all school pictures. Trust me when I say it is the greatest blessing, but I know it won’t always be easy to see it that way!

Remember when people say “look how big you are” to immediately take it as a compliment and forgive their wording if it doesn’t sound flattering. You see, people don’t mean to sound insensitive, they just don’t even consider their words before they say them. My mom was truly the most incredible influence as she was so quick to program my brain that tall=beautiful! They were interchangeable words in her world and thus mine. I never had a chance to be self-conscious about my height as my mom did daily affirmations that made me lead with positivity. When someone was to say anything to me (you are so tall, you are so cute, you are a big girl, etc.) I was to immediately respond with a “thank you!” The affirmations were daily and I had to repeat them three times. First, she would say it, then I would repeat three times. I am strong, I am strong, I am strong! I am smart, I am smart, I am smart! I am beautiful, I am beautiful, I am beautiful!

The constant repetition made me believe it and created a very confident little girl. Now don’t get me wrong, I went through an awkward stage where I look back now surprised at the confidence I had for the way that I looked. But that is the very root of the issue, it didn’t matter what I looked like on the outside. My mom made me so strong on the inside and we always discussed that it’s what on the inside that truly matters!

I don’t know at what point it became culturally acceptable to be a “tall girl” and frankly it doesn’t even matter. What does matter is raising strong women that don’t care if they are the shortest or tallest, that they view their individuality as a blessing and they become thankful for that blessing daily.

When people would say that I had big feet, my mom would quickly respond that I would fall over if my feet were any smaller. If people asked if I played volleyball or basketball upon seeing me, my mom would be quick to point out that I was a cheerleader and golfer (two things not usually associated with height).

One of my dear friends has taught me that she tells her daughters “you are strong, you are brave and you can do anything!” anytime they are nervous for something! To be honest, I also tell my boys that on a daily basis. As parents we want healthy, happy confident children who are also kind to others! If we focus on that as opposed to “who is academically gifted” or an “exceptional athlete” we can make tremendous strides in making children feel accepted.

So, to you my fellow girls, stand up tall and walk with pride. For being tall is a gift that should be cherished and it is up to you what you will do with it! And for all the haters out there, my favorite response to any negative comment is “I am sorry you feel that way!”

Know that pants might be hard to find, but that doesn’t matter! Know that you can love someone shorter or taller than you, it doesn’t matter! Like age, height is just a number! You do you! I am proud of you and will always be here for you!